Knittin' Crap: Away Mission, Day 5

My sr. officer director did not return as scheduled yesterday with the Red Shirt, or even report in send an email. This means I will also be without a surrogate target on my own away mission trip to HQ next week. As it's currently a disaster zone major pollen locus up there, I'm a goner.

Knittin' Crap: Away Mission, Day 2

The sr. officer director did send a short communication email after my last report post, giving no indication of distress. However, we are still analyzing the message for an encoded update in case he was forced to send it under duress. One officer group manager has postulated that the sr. officer director may be part Romulan, in which case we will have to re-evaluate our interpretation of his messages.

Knittin' Crap: Away Mission, Day 1

Red Shirt #1 and my sr. officer director have been gone over 24 hours now, with no communication. This can mean one of only two things: Red Shirt #1 is already a casualty but hasn't been placed on the casualty rolls because my superior has been taken captive in meetings all day, or they're under fire, um, in really crappy meetings but can't call for help because communications are jammed the damn office wifi is crapping out. Again.

Knittin' Crap: Life of a Red Shirt

Saturday: Faceless Red Shirt #1 comes into being.
Monday morning: Bring Red Shirt #1 to office. RS#1 narrowly escapes encounter with desktop creeper:

Monday, throughout the day: I learn to type while wearing a finger puppet.
Monday afternoon: My boss³ asks if I have a Star Trek finger puppet handy. I say yes and produce Red Shirt #1. He asks if he can borrow him this week for his trip to headquarters for a meeting with his boss. I say ok.
Monday, 5 minutes later: I start to wonder if Red Shirt #1 will come back in one piece, or have a giant scorch mark on its chest.
Monday, late afternoon: I miss the nameless, faceless Red Shirt #1 already.

News: Why I'm Joining Friendface!

I haven't bashed on Facebook for awhile, so here are some funny, and at least one creepy, themed items.

Funny:

• 
  
  see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!
• 
  see more epicfails
• Chuck (or is that Beans?) is looking for me, I just know it...

Creepy:

• Facebook offshores its picture moderating, giving people who get paid less-than-crap and undergo little to no criminal background checks access to your account.